I Am Not Sure How He Does It

I did not dream of my wedding day since I was 5 years old.
I can eat an entire box of pasta.
I do not have a favorite color.
I love to write but I hate to read.
I can cook an awesome meal for a crowd, but seriously bomb dinner for Andy 3 out of 5 times a week.
I had to run out of the gym once after I saw a woman wipe out on the treadmill and 15 minutes later I still couldn't stop laughing.
I was 24 years old when that happened.
I cannot leave the grocery store without spending at least 35$, even if I only came for charcoal.
I do not call/email people who I truly miss.
I think Dance Dance Revolution is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen.

I was the mother who forgot to bring Valentine's for Bella's MDO class.

The above statement also applies to Christmas, Halloween and Thanksgiving parties.

I will leave a load of clothes in the dryer and re-run the fluffer for days and I still consider that "doing the laundry".

I could sleep until 3 o'clock in the afternoon.

I have a very strong distaste for Dr. Laura Schlesinger.

I cannot help but laugh uncontrollably when I see someone hit their head on something.
I had my driver's license taken away by the state when I was 17.
I was told that being a biological mother might be difficult for my body to accomplish, 9 years before I had my daughter.
I fall down very easily.
I have only written a letter of complaint one time in my life and that was to the Montel Williams Show.
I also then wrote the Dr. Phil show to tell on Montel Williams.
I cannot maintain any sort of composure if I hear someone fart. In fact, just writing this one down...I am laughing to myself.
I can and have successfully gone a consecutive 14 days without ever leaving my house.
I text message when I drive.
I have had to pick myself up off of the ground more than once.
I have decided to wallow in my misery more than twice.
I have truly hurt those closest to me more than I want to think about.
I am not always the best wife to my husband.
I know who the enemy is.
I am still learning who God is.
I have not yet decided who I am.

And my husband, my hero, the one I believe in most in this world...believes in me.