A Day in the Life of a Tilly

Deleting this Blog

2009-01-26T18:18:00.001-06:00

Ok for any of you who still use this Blogger page as access to the link to www.emilytilly.com, this blog is about to be deleted. So it's time to make the switch! If you have www.tillyfamilyblog.blogspot.com on your blog roll then you might want change it. Thanks!

New Web Site

2008-08-04T12:57:00.002-05:00

Ok, to you guys who read this blog...It is officially moving!

www.emilytilly.com is the new spot. I will not be posting to www.tillyfamilyblog.blogspot.com as of today. My much neglected food blog (I know, it's my fault!) is not going anywhere for the time being.

For those of you who have me on your blogroll, you might want to make the change. If not, no worries.

Thanks Blogger, but I am done.

Moments with Bella...

2008-08-02T10:09:00.003-05:00

So Bella and I had a moment this morning. We were snuggled up on the couch...

Me: You want me to tell you a story Bella?

Bella: Yes Mom.

Me: Ok, close your eyes. Once upon a time there was a little girl named Isabella Grace Haggabagga Iggaboo Ho-Ho Tilly. (I know, I know) And she had a Momma and a Daddy who love her very much. And she is my sweet, stinky little woman.

Bella: Ok, my ton.

Me: Ok, your turn.

Bella: Go to sleep. Cwose you eyes.

Me: Ok.

Bella: Wuns-pon-tie...Oh I buped.

Me: Is that your story Bella? That you burped?

Bella: No, I jus buped in you face. Now go to sleep. Cwose you eyes.

So I close my eyes, after having my face burped in rather than a sweet story from my little girl yet still expecting to have hear a precious pearl of imagination from her. She gets close to me and puts her little hands on my face. I am thinking, this is going to be great.

Bella: Wuns-pon-tie...

It is then that I get a slimy, hot little tongue slid across my forehead.

Bella: I licked you face Momma.

Me: I know Bella. I know.

Bella: I'm done wit you Momma.

Me: Alright, thanks Bella.

Bella: You wewcome.

The In-Laws

2008-08-02T09:58:00.002-05:00

I got it good. I mean, when it comes to family members that have come along via a marriage, I seriously can say that I have it really, really good. My amazing mother came up with the term "Bonus Children" rather than Son-in-law or Daughter-in-law. I love that. So here is what my Bonus Family is like. And by the way, if it sounds like I am bragging...that's because I am.

My brother's wife, Robbie...geez. Could I have asked for a more caring, funny, sweet, patient and well-rounded wife for my brother? Nuh-uh. I could not. Seriously, an absolute jewel of a human being. Seriously. I wish I could be half of the wife that Robbie is. She is just awesome. My brother is such an incredible person who was going to be an amazing daddy and husband that it had to take someone pretty special for them to deserve him as far as I was concerned. That's exactly what she is.

Now, Andy is the youngest of 3 boys. Probably gonna have a problem with someone in the mix there right? Um, nope. Matt, the oldest, I am just getting to know and have discovered that he is really a great guy to hang around with. He is an amazing Dad even in some pretty tough circumstances by all accounts. Any guy that will sit during his alone time and let my kid flop on his bed to watch Deadliest Catch with him has got to be a pretty great Uncle.

Luke...I just adore Luke. When I think of the words generous or giving, that's Luke. At first Bella was terrified of his deep bellowing voice, but now Unka Looook is a common topic of conversation in her little world. Now Luke's wife Janie, or Jane-Jane, is seriously one of my greatest friends and closest confidant. Not only did I get Robbie who is incredible, I got it extra good getting to have 2 amazing Bonus Sisters. There is a lot to be said for having a safe place to do some serious venting without it turning into husband bashing. That only works when you have someone who loves and cares about your spouse as well. Plus, I have a built-in advice giver since in a lot of ways, we kind of married different versions of the same person. She makes me laugh until I almost wet my pants...that's my Jane.

Now Jim and Sammye. Alright, I think if you know me then you know how absolutely phenomenal I think that my Mom and Dad are. And if you know them, then you know that I am right. I Love My Momma and My Daddy. So much that it is hard to even find the words. But what did I end up with after I married Andy? A whole new set. And I gotta say that I have got to have probably the best Bonus Parents in the world. In fact, I love being with Jim and Sammye so much that when Bella was a newborn and Andy started traveling all the time I pretty much moved in with them. More than once. More than twice. Not because I had to or was pressured to or needed help. Seriously I just wanted to be there. I mean, I just spent almost 2 weeks sleeping in their living room and there was no other place in the world that I wanted to be for that moment in time. Of course your parent's house feels like home. I love being home with my parents. It's a comfort that is hard to match. But your in-laws house? Ummm, yep. I got that. Cooking with Jim is one of my most favorite things and learning how to cook from him is a close second. Jim raised my amazing husband to believe deep in himself that he can do anything. You know what? He can.
Laying around for days in my ratty house shorts with Sammye as we watch Dr. Phil episodes that she has been recording for over a year now is priceless time to me. Even if it does take us 3 hours to watch one show with all of the kids running chaotically around the house. I am so thankful for so much that Jim and Sammye have done for me, no questions asked. What I am most thankful for though? Having that third kid. Thank you for his life, his mind, his humor, his faith, his stability, his courage, his hope and of course for makin' such a good lookin' kid! That's what I always want them to know, thank you for Andy.

So again, if it sounds like I am bragging then you heard me correctly. I love my family. I. Love. My. Family.

Moments with Bella...

2008-07-30T17:31:00.006-05:00

From the other end of the house:

Bella: Momma, Momma...my booty huts. My booty huts!
Me: What Bella, why does your booty hurt?
Bella: Momma, jus c'meew. My booty huts!

As I enter her room, Bella is naked standing in the middle of the floor. She is smiling and in no pain at all. It is obvious she just wanted me to see what she had accomplished.

Bella: See Momma, my booty huts. (Snicker, snicker...)
Me: Take the hanger out from between your butt cheeks Bella.
Bella: Oh, Thanks Momma.

Our Home

2008-07-29T12:45:00.006-05:00

We have lived in our beautiful home for a little over a year now. This was our first house to buy since we have been married and I must admit that I am very, very proud to say that it is ours. We started in 600 sq. feet, then 744 sq. feet, then 800 sq. feet, then 950 sq. feet before we ended up where we call home today. And yes you did count correctly, if you include our move into our first place, Andy and I have moved 5 times in the last 3 1/2 years. Needless to say, we are very, very good at moving.

I love this house. I mean I really, really love this house. Really. After a year I am still learning the ins and outs of home ownership. For instance, I get the pleasure of knowing that I can paint any room in the house any color that I want to...because I can, and I did. Andy can drill holes in any wall of the house to hang our massive speakers that of which I can play music out of any time of day as loud as I want to...and he did, and I do. I can have more than 1 person in the kitchen at a time and not have to go hose down after I get done cooking dinner...and I love it. So many good things some to mind. However there are a few negatives that I have learned. For instance, if the hot water heater, in the hellishly hot attic, on a Saturday night, the night before Father's day, THE DAY THAT OUR HOME WARRANTY EXPIRES, decides to go out, um yea you gotta pay for that yourself. Things like that haven't been so great but I get it, it's just part of it.

I will say that I discovered today that in case of a fire in our home, we will definitely be woken from our sleep by the ear-piercing symphony from our securely mounted, fully operational, 8 smoke detectors. I know this because today I set them off. All of them. 10 times. The food I was cooking for Andy's team lunch is in the trashcan outside and it smells like someone played the flaming bag of dog poop trick on us about 15 times. And then we decided to take one to bed with us and place 5 of them in our living room for safe keeping. It stinks in here today.

But you know what? It's alright. Because I just love this house.

Life is Good.

2008-07-28T16:58:00.003-05:00

I love my little girl so much. I don't even have the words.

Incase You Were Wondering

2008-07-27T13:49:00.005-05:00

Back from our time away from home and ready to get posting again. However just a quick one today. It has come to my attention that some who attended the Life Church.tv youth camp a few weeks ago left with the impression that a joke between our dear friend Zack King and Andy was indeed true rather than just a silly thing that silly boys do. Although this was not the first year for the before mentioned joke, I actually began receiving congratulations after this year as did my parents. Of course I felt the need to clear the air.

So one quick note: No, I am not nor have I ever been pregnant with twins. And no, I was not pregnant last year or the year before that one. I am not that tough of a woman and if any of this were true, and I did indeed have 3 children with 2 more on the way in just the last 3 years then I would be writing you this post from the Looney Bin.

Just thought I would pass that along.

To Whom It May Concern

2008-07-14T08:47:00.002-05:00

Bella and I are taking some very, very much needed time in Oklahoma for the next 10 days. The blog will probably get the boot off my "things to do list" until we get back based on the fact that my "things to do list" has nothing on it other than the following

1. Enjoy not being in full Mommy Mode.
2. Stay in my pajamas all day long while my mother-in-law does the same thing and not be ashamed of it at all.
3. Only switch out of before mentioned pajamas to take the girls outside and play naked in the sprinkler. (Not me, the kids.)
4. Cook and eat and cook and eat.
5. Soak up time with 3 of my favorite people in the world. Mimi, Pa and Uncle Matt.

Even If...

2008-07-11T11:41:00.003-05:00

Years ago God put a statement deep in my heart that I knew was a way He was going to call me to live my life.

Even If...

Even If all of the things that could go wrong, start to go wrong, what are you going to do? What choice are you going to make? That being said, it really didn't cross my mind for years why God would have spoken that to me out of all things He could have said. I have to say that the past 7 years of being naive about what God wanted to do with me was pretty great. Yet in the last 2 years of my life, it has been made clear that it was now time to put that to work. Without going into too much detail, in my own life and in the lives of some of those who are close to me, God has allowed some trials to come up that have me asking myself, do I really mean it? It was easy to say it to others and have them try to live it out. Yet, now this is me. This is my life. This is my closest friend's life that has been shattered my learning her husband has been living a double life. This is a close family friend who has lost their baby. This is the simple fact that in the blink of an eye, life can make a 180 and toss you so hard you don't have any idea which way is up. Over the last 8 months God has added 3 words to what He spoke to me 7 years ago that has changed my life. You know what else...It has thrown me for a loop.

Even If Not...

That's right. Even If...Even If Not. Even if all of the things that could come your way do? What are you going to do Even if God decides Not to answer your cries for help in the way you thought He would. Even if your kid gets deathly ill. Even if God does Not heal them. Even if your spouse deeply betrays you. Even if your spouse does Not choose to stop the lies and help heal your heart. Even if you are a victim of a terrible car accident. Even if a check for your $500,000 in medical bills does Not show up in your mailbox. I'll be honest and say that when I started to realize how God was calling me to live my life, I got really, really scared. I mean, would God go through trying to show me all of this if I didn't have something waiting for me in the future where I am going to need to use it? A tad bit daunting...a tad. So as I wallowed in a bad mix of fear/anxiousness/excitement I found myself in this short, direct and life changing conversation with God.

Me: Alright God, I get what you're sayin. I get what it is that you want me to do with my life. Even If...Even If Not. But you gotta tell me how in the world I am supposed to start this. How do I do that?
God: First, Love Fearlessly.

That was it.
So I sat down to write it out.
Even If...
Even If Not...
Love Fearlessly.

(By the way, Cindy Beall wrote a great post about When God Says No that I think helps sum up the Even If Not part of things.)

Daddy's Big Bye-Bye

2008-07-09T10:56:00.006-05:00

Bella woke up missing Andy this morning. I have been prepping her for him to be gone for the next 14 days or so starting on Saturday. Little does she know that this year has been the most that Andy has been home since we have been married. But she has no idea what the last 2 Summers have been like. Today she started to get nervous...
First thing when she woke up-

Bella: Wayer is Dad at Mom?
Me: He went to work Bella.
Bella: He need to come back Mom.
Me: Why Bella? He will be back later today.
Bella: Heez not on heez big bye-bye today?
Me: No Bella, that's not here yet. He is just at his office.
Bella: Wit Papa and Uncle Bubba?
Me: Yep.
Bella: I don't want heez big bye-bye Mom.
Me: Why Bella? You are going to have fun with me.
Bella: No Mom, onwy Dad is fun.
Me: Bella, I am fun too. What do you think we do all day?
Bella: Um, you hep me poop..............an put me in time out.
Me: I do more than that Bella. Come on now.
Bella: Um...........an you get me macawoni an cheese das too hot fo me.
Me: Whatever Bella.
Bella: Wudeber Mom.

It could be a long 2 weeks.

I Am Not Sure How He Does It

2008-07-08T11:00:00.005-05:00

I did not dream of my wedding day since I was 5 years old.
I can eat an entire box of pasta.
I do not have a favorite color.
I love to write but I hate to read.
I can cook an awesome meal for a crowd, but seriously bomb dinner for Andy 3 out of 5 times a week.
I had to run out of the gym once after I saw a woman wipe out on the treadmill and 15 minutes later I still couldn't stop laughing.
I was 24 years old when that happened.
I cannot leave the grocery store without spending at least 35$, even if I only came for charcoal.
I do not call/email people who I truly miss.
I think Dance Dance Revolution is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen.

I was the mother who forgot to bring Valentine's for Bella's MDO class.

The above statement also applies to Christmas, Halloween and Thanksgiving parties.

I will leave a load of clothes in the dryer and re-run the fluffer for days and I still consider that "doing the laundry".

I could sleep until 3 o'clock in the afternoon.

I have a very strong distaste for Dr. Laura Schlesinger.

I cannot help but laugh uncontrollably when I see someone hit their head on something.
I had my driver's license taken away by the state when I was 17.
I was told that being a biological mother might be difficult for my body to accomplish, 9 years before I had my daughter.
I fall down very easily.
I have only written a letter of complaint one time in my life and that was to the Montel Williams Show.
I also then wrote the Dr. Phil show to tell on Montel Williams.
I cannot maintain any sort of composure if I hear someone fart. In fact, just writing this one down...I am laughing to myself.
I can and have successfully gone a consecutive 14 days without ever leaving my house.
I text message when I drive.
I have had to pick myself up off of the ground more than once.
I have decided to wallow in my misery more than twice.
I have truly hurt those closest to me more than I want to think about.
I am not always the best wife to my husband.
I know who the enemy is.
I am still learning who God is.
I have not yet decided who I am.

And my husband, my hero, the one I believe in most in this world...believes in me.

I Don't Know Why I Am Surprised

2008-07-07T09:17:00.003-05:00

We just got back to Denton after a great few days in our hometown of Edmond, OK for the 4th. We did a lot of relaxing, spent a lot of much needed time with some of our closest friends and just had an all around great time. Oh yea, and we discovered that our daughter happens to be more fearless than we thought. This was Bella's first time in a real swimming pool where she was actually able to enjoy it on her own. Yes, I said on her own. At first she was a little timid, however I should have known that wasn't going to last. Soon all I heard was "Momma, let me do it by myself". By the end of Day 1 Bella was entertaining the crowd by sitting with water covering all the way over the top of her head, looking around under the water at everyone. By the end of Day 2, she was actually holding onto things just to keep her head under water longer. And I am not exaggerating on that one folks. My kid is part fish.
She also had a first time experience with coming face-to-face with 2 very large horses both of which once again she was not afraid. Andy was more nervous than anyone about her getting her hand taken off when she insisted on feeding these massive animals treat after treat that were no bigger than a piece of shredded wheat. In fact, Bella introduced herself to one of them by jamming her finger up his nostril when I was not paying attention. Of course he didn't like this one bit, however Bella insisted on trying it over and over again because she said "But Mom, heez gots boogers in dayer".
Overall it was an amazing time. Lot's of firsts for our little family. It was a little hard to come back home. I'll get some pictures posted as soon as I get them.

You Silly Tease

2008-07-01T14:22:00.008-05:00

As I lay in my backyard this afternoon for water play time with Bella it hit me. There I was, in my bathing suit, laying in my folding sun-chair...sweating to death. Every now and then I would let the water coming out of the little spout on Bella's Froggie swimming pool (Wal-Mart $4.99 special) sprinkle on my feet to try to keep my body temperature somewhat regulated. It felt a little ghetto, but no one could see me anyway. Soon the Devil Heat of Texas began to get to me. Next thing I knew, I found myself rigging up our Elmo the Firefighter Sprinkler to the water hose only to strategically place it where just the right amount of continuous water would sprinkle across me every few seconds. For a moment, I felt like a genius as I lay perfectly cool in the hot sun...until I glanced up and saw through the cracks in the fence the glistening blue water of the pool next door teasing me like a teenage girl on prom night. (Sorry about that one, but you have to admit it's funny.)
It was that moment that I realized, my little set-up with Elmo and the Froggie Pool probably belonged somewhere that my neighbor would resemble Cousin Eddie from National Lampoon's Vacation. Especially when I found myself irritated that Bella actually wanted to play in the Elmo Sprinkler rather than have me use it for my personal mist machine.
How do I feel about the fact that my Russian neighbor who is in Europe the entire Summer, each and every Summer has a perfectly maintained swimming pool that sits un-used just steps away from my door? Well, I think it's kick you in the crotch, spit on your neck fantastic. And if you ever hear that Andy had to come and bail me out of Denton County Jail...it will be for trespassing.

Beautiful

2008-06-30T08:54:00.006-05:00

I think that Bella is beautiful.

Of course her face is gorgeous, Andy and I do make a good lookin baby! But I think that everything about her is beautiful. Her passion. Her innocence. Her lack of understanding and her growing knowledge of the things around her. Her messy hair that never seems to grow accept for one extra long hair that when fully stretched is inches longer than the rest. Her extreme joy in the little things and her tragic disappointment both over something as simple as a bottle of bubbles. Her need for repetition but also her desire to try something new. Her fearless love. Her precise decisions and her curiosity of what was behind door #2. (She gets that from her Daddy.) Her drama that accompanies random everyday events such as peeing in her Pull-Up all over the picture of Ariel from The Little Mermaid...that was a very, very sad day for Bella yet she has no problem with doing it everyday since then. Her endearing love for people and her cold-as-ice attitude that can make someone feel kinda stupid. Her future, who she will be and what she will accomplish. Her failures that will be painful but will shape her strength for the next time. Her touch. Her smell. Her tears. Her laugh. Her love. Her fear. Her hope.

I think everything, every single thing about Bella is beautiful. I want to make it my goal that she will never, ever have to wonder otherwise.

Imagination?

2008-06-27T09:08:00.000-05:00

The other day I was telling someone about something that Bella had come up with and they said to me "How fun, she is starting to imagine". Maybe it's just me but I don't know that I quite consider it imagining as much as I think of it as Bella has just started making stuff up. As for Andy, well he says that she is a liar. I think that's a little harsh yet kind of funny. But he still does a good job of humoring her. (For an example, my post about the monster hunt...)

Here are some of the latest.
Scene- In my car, headed back home from the Argyle Campus
Bella: Momma! I see a ewaphant!
Me: An elephant! Where Bella?
Bella: Wite dayer on da gwass!!!
Me: Really! Wow Bella, cool.
Bella: Uh-huh, hees blue.
Me: A blue elephant, that's great Bella! What's his name?
Bella: Uh-huh, hees name is Isabella Gwace Tilly.
Me: Oh yeah? What a beautiful name.
Bella: Yep, hees bootiful. An he likes chocwat.
Me: Chocolate Bella?
Bella: Uh-huh. An when we get home, I need to give heem one.
Me: Oh you do huh?
Bella: Yes. He peed.
Me: Oh, ok. I get it.
Bella: But...but I need to give da chocwat to heem.
Me: Ok.
Bella: An you need to go in da udder woom.

Or this one
Scene- Tilly Family Living Room, Bella has her "cell phone" up to her ear.
Me: Bella, what are you doing?
Bella: I'm jus talkin to Dad.
Me: Oh yeah, what's Daddy have to say?
Bella: Um...he says hees gonna bwing me a wowitoe.
Me: A burrito? That sounds good. What else is Daddy saying?
Bella: He says dat you needa go to time out Mom.
Me: What? Why do I need to go to time out?
Bella: Because you was naughty.
Me: I was not Bella. You are the naughty one.
Bella: Daddy jus said now you needa spankin.
Me: A spankin! Your nuts.
Bella: No Momma, Daddy says you cwazy or sumfin. (A quote from Channing in their video together, you can watch it...see a few posts back.)
Me: I'm crazy or somthin? I think your crazy or somethin.
Bella: Ok, fine. Now you godda go night-night Mom. Daddy says.

Channing

2008-06-26T11:07:00.000-05:00

Look at these 2 girls. If I didn't know them I would not believe that they were related. Their personalities are very different from each other as well. But I will say this, they are both absolutely hilarious. Little Channing (for those of you who don't know, she is the 3 1/2 year old daughter of my brother Caleb and his wife Robbie)...Channing...seriously she is hands down really stinkin funny. She has never met a stranger and comes up with things that are just priceless. Of course there is no way that my brother could ever have a child that would not have an imagination that is hard to match. For instance when I was at Caleb and Robbie's the other day and I had this conversation with her.

Me: How was your morning Channing?

Channing: Um, Aunt Em I got in trouble this morning. (Um, yes I do make my nieces and nephews call me Aunt Em because I think it's funny.)

Me: Trouble? What did you do?

Channing: Well, I screamed at my Daddy this morning and he was really sad and he made me go and sit on my bed. And I screamed some more and I woke up Asher. And I had to get more time out and I was sad. But I was just starving and Daddy got me a sandwich and I ate it on my bed. And then I danced.

Me: Really? Wow Channing.

Robbie: I just want you to know that none of that ever happened.

She's gonna be a handful.

New Video of Bella and Channing

2008-06-25T12:22:00.001-05:00

Robbie posted a new video of Bella and Channing for anyone who wants to see our 2 crazy little women.

http://kuykendall.wordpress.com/

The Monster

2008-06-25T11:12:00.000-05:00

So monsters are the new thing, but with Bella it's not in a scary way. In fact, being the complex child that Bella is she only acts like she is scared of monsters. For a while she has been talking about a monster in her closet, but the other night she decided it was time for them to make an appearance. She came running into the room yelling "Ahhhhhhhhh" at the top of her lungs and stopped dead in her tracks in the entry way. With those big brown eyes about to pop out of her head, the following took place:

Andy: What is it Bella?
Bella: Dere's a monster in my woom Dad.
Andy: Bella, there are no monsters in your room.
Bella: I said dere's a monster in my woom Dad, wight dayer!! AHHHHHHH!!
Andy: Ok, if there is a monster in your room then prove it.

Andy thought he had out-smarted Bella, however she was about to beat him at his own game. She then directed him to each room in the house in search of the monster.

Bella's room- No monster
Bella's closet- No monster
Guest room #1- No monster
Guest room #1 closet- No monster
Guest room #2- No monster
Guest room #2 closet- No monster
Our room- No monster
Our closet- No monster

Andy: Ok, Bella I told you there were no monsters.
Bella: Ummm, he is on da potty. He needed to pee Dad.

Guest bathroom- No monster

Andy: See Bella, there is no monster on the potty.
Bella: He likes Momma's potty Dad. It's nice and warm in dayer.

It was then that Andy drew the line. As Bella ran back to me on the couch it was clear to me that she felt triumphant. Daddy had chosen not to prove that the monster was not sitting on my toilet, thus to her, he very well could have been.

Me: Well, where's the monster Bella?
Bella: Um...he's on yo potty mom.
Me: He is? You want me to go get him?
Bella: No Mom, don't go get heem. He's poopin.

At least they thought it was funny, Installment # 2

2008-06-23T12:28:00.000-05:00

So I was looking at an empty cardboard roll from the paper towels in the kitchen and I thought of a funny story from when I was a kid.

Since I was a pretty small child, shocker...sorry Bella... my brother Caleb often thought it was entertaining to use that to his advantage in his never-ending urge to come up with things people have never tried before. Now, let me say that today my brother is an AMAZING Daddy and husband. I adore him and admire him in so many ways. Hands down, he is just one of the all around greatest people that I know. He was a great kid as well, but anytime you have a child with an imagination as incredible as Caleb's is you are bound to have some stories.

Most of the time I think he just wanted to see what would happen if he tried something out. Of course, I was the ideal guinea pig for the test runs. We played many rounds of "Let's see if Emily can fit in this" and "Let's find out if Emily can get out of the tree if I take the ladder away". But once Caleb thought it would be funny to see find out just how far Emily could fly.

There I stood on the top of our brick retaining wall, about 4 ft. up off the ground. I waited in innocence dressed in my favorite splatter-painted sweat suit as Caleb stood across the yard from me with a 6 ft. long cardboard tube that had come from a roll of fabric my Mom had in the garage. Now, this thing was not flimsy like the ones your toilet paper comes on. We are talking 1/2 thick cardboard here. I knew he was going to do something. Looking back I can't see why I thought that this was a great idea as well. Suddenly, his charge began. He had his eye on the target which I soon realized was indeed my 9 year old little belly. Next thing I know I was sent flying through the air, backwards off the wall.

This would be a good time to mention that one of the stupidest pieces of landscaping are those huge sticker bushes that do nothing but sit around and have inch long needles of death just waiting to catch some kid by surprise. I am sure they are called something very fancy but I have a better name for them. I mean, Seriously.

Needless to say, my adventure through the air accompanied by the 4 ft. drop off came to a painful end in our neighbors bushes, which yes...were a nice, very well grown patch of Hell Bushes. My stomach was on fire and apparently there had been a convorsation between the devil thorns, my butt and my thighs at which it was decided that they should all meet. At least Caleb thought it was funny...

Shirt Tucking 101

2008-06-22T13:50:00.004-05:00

Alright, today as Andy and I were at lunch we began to observe the phenomenon of the fashion world that surrounds all of us each and every day. It hit me that there is a rather large amount of people in today's society who subscribe to the school of thought that there is more than one way to tuck in your shirt. Let's take a look at a few examples and just for kicks, I am going to relate the tuck style to some priceless and well known choices people make when it comes to the way that they wear their hair.

The Full Tuck:
Let's relate this one to the simple, Pro-Cuts special. The clean cut. To me, if you are going to tuck in your shirt then this is the only acceptable way to do so. However, with this tuck there should always be a reasonable space between the top of the pants and your armpits. Just because you tuck in your shirt to look nice does not mean that it is acceptable in any way, shape or form to wear your pants in a way that makes all of those around you uncomfortable at the fact that your crotch is on display for the world to see. If that region resembles the hoof of an animal AT ALL then your pants are pulled up entirely too high and you need to stop doing that. Today, seriously.

The Side Tuck:
This one would be the comb-over of the tucking world. One side of the shirt staying tucked snuggly right above the waistband of the pants while the opposite side hangs free creating an effect across the belly that can be handy for hiding a beer belly or even a muffin top. Thus, the illusion of a trim figure underneath and hiding any embarrassing Skin Spillage. However just like with the comb-over in the hair world, you are not fooling anyone. Underneath that strategically placed piece of fabric is indeed a pooch of some sort. We all got it...well most of us do...just like there are lot's of bald guys out there. So how about we just drop the act and give it up. Really.

The Front Tuck:
Undoubtedly the mullet of the tuck club. Business in the Front, Party in the Back. While Andy still wants to argue that when he used to wear his shirts this way it was acceptable, I find that hard to believe. It's like there has not yet been a decision made as to if the theme of the outfit is going to be laid back and relaxed or ready to meet your girlfriend's parents for the first time. Similar to the mullet which happens to have the same flaw, there is a lack of clear definition of intentions. Are you ready to go to a company meeting, or toss on the nearest sleeveless shirt and head to the State Fair, listening to Jethro Tull and Journey all the way there in your pick-up truck while your girlfriend rides directly next to you, leaving the passenger seat wide open for no good reason? Let's just decide, tuck or no tuck...short hair or long (sometimes even permed) hair. It needs to be done.

Jesus Better Make My Hands Fall Off

2008-06-19T15:58:00.007-05:00

****Warning: This might be a tad bit offensive to some...****

Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Now let me say this. There are very, very few people that if I ever met them in real life...I would be tempted to open-hand slap them across the face. (Not hard, but just like a prissy, girl fight kind of slap.)

This woman is one of them.

If you listen to talk radio at all then you know who she is. At first, every now and then I would turn her show on and listen to a caller or two. But the more that I began to actually listen to this lady the more my extreme my distaste grew for her. It honestly makes me wanna reach through the radio and have my hand pop out of her microphone as she is making some poor, divorced 39 year-old mother of 3 feel like a moron for being lonely and pinch her lips shut as tight as I possibly can.
What spurred this post today was that I was in the car this afternoon and decided to give her one more shot. Let me say that the fact that this woman spent 10 minutes insulting and mocking a 19 year old girl who said she had a eating disorder but was 5'3" and weighed 160 lbs bothered me. However then Dr. Laura actually said something similar to this to the girl caller:
"Well, if you are 5'3" and weigh 160 lbs...I think it's safe to say that you are not very good at having an eating disorder. Why don't you just hang up the phone and go eat a muffin because you are boring me."
This next statement floored me.
"No wonder you choose to eat yourself into a stupor, because people like you are boring."

Are You Freakin Kidding Me?

Not very often do people make me as angry as she does, but one thing I cannot stand is when someone is given the gift of a platform to speak life into hurting people and instead they use their power to do the opposite. I am all for telling people the truth, which can sometimes be painful. I mean geez, I LOVE me some Dr. Phil folks! But this is ridiculous.
In closing, I don't want anyone to think I just want to go around slapping people all of the time. But I would say that if I ever bumped into Dr. Laura in person and she caught me at the right moment in time...and my husband didn't work for God...Jesus better make my hands fall off.

Vent session complete.

The Bubble Popper

2008-06-18T12:56:00.004-05:00

God is good.

Now, I know that line sounds like it should be coming from someone very spiritual. I however, am not. I hope this isn't shocking to anyone who might read this. In fact over the last few days I have started to become rather nervous about how many people actually read this blog. What if I say something that bothers someone? What if some part of something I write makes someone think differently about my husband or my family? Either way, if you are someone who has an illusion of what Pastor's Wives or Pastor's Daughters should be like, then I am sorry to tell you that I just may be someone who might easily pop that bubble for you.

I am starting to think that my reason for believing God is good is based on something different than people might assume. To me, God is good because of what He knows about me but still keeps giving me more and more blessings in my life. (Be forewarned, the following statements might be bubble-poppers for some of you...)

He knows that I have a mouth on me that could make a construction worker blush. He knows that I have a temper that has left people wounded in my wake at times in my life. He knows that when I get hurt by someone, I have been know to use my words in a devastating way. He knows the stories from my past that I hope I never have to see my daughter go through for herself. He knows how often I am not thankful for all that I have been given. He knows how many times I have questioned Him and His desire to help me. He knows how many times I have been angry with Him. He knows all of the times I have turned away and tried to do it on my own...to be honest the last time was more recent than I want to admit.

My point is, God is good in my mind because I am just not. I am probably the last person who anyone would have ever thought would be married to a Pastor. But I guess that my husband is one of the last people that anyone would have thought would be a Pastor...So we are a good fit. However, isn't that what it's really all about anyway? I guess I see it that if you have it all together, then what do you need God for? In fact, "Having it all together" is such a foreign concept to me that I don't even know that I would recognize it if it jumped up and slugged me right in the face. But I do know that God is Who He Says He is. He loves me like He says He does. At the end of the day, all I can do is try the best that I can and do the best with what I have been given.

Just being honest...

The Whisper Game

2008-06-17T11:52:00.003-05:00

The following post is not meant to be offensive to people in wheelchairs in any way. If you think you are someone who might be offended easily at this matter, just pass this post on by.

Ok, so this morning once again I am in Albertson's on Loop 288 in Denton. Yes, this is the same place that humiliation has plagued me at the hand of the adorable, very well spoken and innocent little girl. This morning had all of the makings of the most embarrassing few seconds of my life, however in my effort to save myself or someone else the humiliation I seem to have stumbled across a way of stopping the problem dead in its tracks while still allowing my free-thinking 2 1/2 year old to express herself...
As we strolled through the produce section (which still makes me nervous after the whole "bear incident") when I saw a man in a wheelchair. We exchanged smiles and "Good Mornings" and I kept moving on. However as I glanced at Bella I noticed that this had definitely caught her attention. I watched her little eyes studying this man who was in what I am sure she thought was very interesting. Since I love to watch my sweet baby spin her little wheels in her head as she tries to figure something out, I sat for a few seconds and watched her think, and think, and think. But then it hit me...

Sweet Father in Heaven, please do not let Bella say anything that is going to hurt this guy's feelings. Like really, please.

Right about that moment, the man slightly changed the angle of his chair. I saw then that both of his legs had been amputated at the knee. Normally this would not have struck me in any way, however I realized then that Bella had zeroed in on the fact that something was very different here. Holy crap, what is she going to say. I immediately sprung into action in true mother fashion and whispered gently in her ear...
Me: We are going to play the whisper game now Bella. Can you do that?
Bella (In her best whisper voice): Ok Momma. I can do dat.
Me: So anything you want to ask Mommy, you need to whisper it ok?
Bella (with her eyes still locked on the man in the wheelchair): Ok Mom. But...but...
Me: But what Bella? You can talk to Momma. Just WHISPER.
Bella: Ok, but Momma...Wher'd heez legs go?
Me: Good whispering Bella. Keep it up.
Bella: But...but, is dey hiding?
Me: Bella, he may have gotten a bad boo-boo on his legs and they had to go away.
Bella: Can I hep him find dem?
Me: That's sweet Bella, but I think he is ok. Alright?
Bella: Ok Mom. But if I find dem, I can give dem to him?
Me: Yes Bella, if you find them you can give them back to him.

So I seemingly avoided what could have been an extremely awkward situation all with quick thinking. The Whisper Game is going to be a staple with Bella in social situations from now on. Let's just hope it works. I finally left that Albertson's with my head hanging high and knowing that my innocent little girl had not unknowingly insulted anyone or made me look like an idiot. It was a proud morning for me.

Grandpa

2008-06-16T11:34:00.007-05:00

Have you ever noticed that things that seemed normal to you as a child, looking back as an adult were just out right odd? Get this...

Ok, so my family has a long history of being carpenters. I grew up with the smell of sawdust as a comfort scent because that meant that someone who I loved was near. At one particular shop that the family woodworking business was housed in when I was around 6 or 7 there was a dog, and it's name was Grandpa. Strange...not too much.
Grandpa was a large mut of sorts who lived in the hollow walls of the shop. Very rarely would Grandpa venture outside the little secret passage ways, at least not when all of the shop tools were going. So if you wanted to see Grandpa, you had to go into my Uncle Jay's office where on the back wall was a hole in the wood paneling. There hung a toilet seat with the word "Grandpa" crudely scribbled across the top with a red magic marker. The protocol to get Grandpa to appear was to literally stick your head into the toilet seat and call "Grandpa...Grandpa..." to echo throughout the walls of the offices until the sound of a heavy, labored shuffle could be heard to signify that Grandpa was indeed on the way to meet you. Now, looking back...this was a little weird.
One day, Grandpa surprised us all when a litter of puppies made their appearance at the shop. Grandpa was indeed a Mommy. And who was the father, a tiny, raggedy little mut dog who for some reason was named FeFe. And the puppies...we named all of them Zoro.
Yep, and we thought it was awesome.

At least they thought it was funny

2008-06-16T10:49:00.006-05:00

So I have decided to start a new series of random blog posts called "At Least They Thought it was Funny". Basically anything that was probably humiliating on one person, was probably pretty entertaining to someone else. The first entry...about yours truly.

Ask Andy, I seriously humiliate myself on a pretty normal basis. Sometimes I wonder if he keeps me around for the simple fact that the ways that I am able to embarrass myself are actually highly entertaining.

Case-in-point, there was a time before Andy and I were married that I can still remember vividly. I was working for Andy with our mobile youth ministry called Xperience It. We were preparing to take about 50 kids on a weekend retreat, those of which happened to be the student leaders that it was my sole purpose to guide and direct as well as set a good example to. I was rushing around in such a hurry trying to get out the door to beat the rush of parents who were eager to get rid of their teenager for a weekend. I put on my "dirty" jeans that I knew I wouldn't be too upset if they got ruined during the weekend of chaos and hauled it to the car.

Did I closely inspect the left-rear pocket of those jeans? No, no I did not. WHO DOES THAT ANYWAY??? I headed to the church in Guthrie, ready to get to work and get out of town.
Did I think it was odd that a few teenage boys were maintaining a steady focus on my backside? No I did not. I mean, its teenage boys folks.
Did I notice much when I seemed to "snag" the back part of my jeans on the bus door? No, infact being that I have a little bit of junk in my trunk, it just happens.
Did I think it was strange that there were snickers and giggles in my general direction. No, again teenage boys.
Can I describe the level of humiliation that I felt when I realized that I was walking around for the entire day with fully exposed panties that couldn't help but avoid the GAPING whole in the back of my pants? No, I cannot.

Was I surprised a week later to enter the sanctuary to be greeted by a giant picture of my backside on a 10 foot x 16 foot projector screen moving from side to side complete with music in the background with the words Xperience It in giant print across my butt? Well, that was a little shocking.

2 years later did the following words come out of my mouth?
"If that #$*% picture shows up at the wedding Andy, I am walking and I mean it."
Yes, yes indeed they did.

At least they thought it was funny.

Notice Anything?

2008-06-16T10:38:00.003-05:00

The Schedule below was taken from the official handbook for Falls Creek 2008. On the very last page of the handbook is a listing of the speakers who will be featured at Falls Creek 2009.

Notice Anything?

June 8-12 Week 3 Falls Creek: Jeff Johson, Praise and Worship
Dave Edwards, Evening Speaker

June 15-19 Week 4 Falls Creek: Kyle Cantrell, Praise and Worship
Ronnie Hill, Evening Speaker

June 22-26 Week 5 Falls Creek: Dutton Band, Praise and Worship
Andy Tilly, Evening Speaker

June 29-July 3 Week 6 Falls Creek: Dutton Band, Praise and Worship
Lance Shumake, Evening Speaker

July 6-10 Week 7 Falls Creek: Matt Papa, Praise and Worship
Tony Nolan, Evening Speaker

That's right folks. He's gonna be at FALLS CREEK!!!

Great Video of Bella and Channing

2008-06-13T11:21:00.001-05:00

Ok, so if you want to see something funny...our little Channing Kuykendall and Bella at their best, go watch this video on Robbie's blog. I think it's priceless...

http://kuykendall.wordpress.com/

If You're Gonna Hide...

2008-06-09T13:01:00.007-05:00

Having a tiny-sized child definitely has it's interesting little additions to everyday life. For instance the random person thinking my child is the smartest 1 1/2 year old they have ever met, only to find out that they are indeed a year off in the age estimate. But in addition to the random awkwardness of this type of conversation with a perfect stranger, there are a few size related issues that can be a little scary and quite hilarious at the same time. Example: The ability to hide in the most non-obvious of places. Granted sometimes Bella does consider it "hiding" when she simply throws a blanket over her head on the couch as Andy comes in the door from work and remains convinced that he cannot see her until she rips the blanket from her head screams at the top of her lungs.
But when she does decide to really, really hide it can get a little scary for me being that she can fit in places that you wouldn't normally think of. The hamper, Andy's suitcase, inside one of the kitchen cabinets to name a few. There is one spot that she has chosen to favor more than all of the other which is simple to point out now, however the first few times she tried it out it literally took me 20 minutes to find her. You see, Bella can not only fit into small places, she also has possesses a unique skill for a 2 1/2 year old in which she can remain perfectly silent as her tiny little body is tucked away waiting for me to stumble across her. She waits in anticipation for the second when I let out my fake scream of terror at which time she let's out her most fearsome ROOOOAAAAR that happens to be her impression of Sully on Monster's Inc.
Today Bella was in this new favorite spot which happens to be tucked behind the clothes on the lower rack of our rather large walk-in closet. Most kids you would spot right off of the bat, yet Bella can tuck so far back in there and she uses her skilled little hands to steady the movement of the clothes around her to be sure there is no hint of her to be found. Since I know this spot well now, even though she switches up which part of the closet she hides in I knew exactly where she ran ran off to after I stripped her of her Pull-Up this morning. However today it was quite humorous the series of events that followed her hiding session. I did my normal routine where I state a few times "Where did Bella go?? I hope she doesn't scare me!!" This time as she emerged from her hiding place once she knew she was caught I noticed that one of my tennis shoes was following her. As she took a few more steps she also realized that something had decided to join her to come and scare Mommy. She quickly reached the level of a slight freak out that then turned into an all out panic as she frantically turned in circles trying to get rid of this object that was following her at a fierce pace. She had no idea what was going on and kept screaming
"Da shoo is twying to get me Mommy!!! Is a SHOO MONSTER MOMMY!!!"
However I could easily see the problem...and it was truly hilarious. Now, Bella knows NOT to pee-pee on the floor. However it seems that the need to "go" had hit her right in the middle of her hiding time. Due to her stubborn nature she chose to not just make the 6 step run to the potty out of principle for the task at hand. Instead she chose to simply wiggle around on the closet floor to try and stop the natural "flow" of things. Yet apparently during her un-controlled wiggling in efforts to stay hidden and not pee on the floor at the same time she seemed to have great success in snuggling the shoelace of one of my tennis shoes to lay directly between her 2 tiny little butt cheeks just like a big piece of dental floss. Being that I wear a size 5 shoe, it was not hard to see how this tiny hiney could have such a great grip on a worn out Nike, especially in the midst of a panic episode.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna hide, you better put some pants on or at least head to the potty first.

New Recipes

2008-06-08T13:59:00.001-05:00

I am working on a few new recipe posts on my much-neglected food blog. By tonight I should have at least 6 or 7 new ones up. Well, that's my goal anyway. For anyone interested it's www.newmealideas.blogspot.com

Enjoy!

The One About the Fence

2008-06-04T10:33:00.010-05:00

Andy took a much needed few days up at a cabin North of McKinney to do some fishing and relaxing. After 2 nights he decided that he wanted to stay one more night but he wanted me to come and spend it with him. Such a doll that husband of mine. Such a doll...

Anyway, here is what Andy did:

And here is what I did:

What you see here might only look like scratches, however in actuality it is 1/2 inch deep puncture wound in the back of my calf muscle accompanied by 3 gashes in my leg and knee. There was an incident with a barbed-wire fence, my hands were too full to catch myself...and as I fell with force of my entire body weight onto the rusty fence, the entire barb decided to settle nicely directly in the back of my leg. 4 days later, the entire portion of my leg is a shade of black that to me would normally indicate a form of the plague. However Dr. Josh Clark at the ER Care Clinic down the street from our house assures me that the maximum strength anti-biotic and emergency tetanus shot that I received on Sunday should take care of everything.

For the Record: I did not cry. I did not return to the cabin. I did not ask Andy to go and get me a bandage to seal up the gaping whole in the back of my leg. I got a piece of semi-clean ice from our cooler and after the bleeding stopped waddled my way through waist high grass only to watch Andy catch one fish after another that of which he had me repeatedly take pictures of.

The 1 and only fish that I did catch was too small to even get out the camera for however I did receive a new nickname from my husband...

Barb

A Room with a View

2008-06-04T10:19:00.009-05:00

Hands down one the the highlights of our trip to NYC a few weeks ago was our amazing hotel room. 2 full walls of our suite were floor to ceiling windows and to make it even better, we were in a corner room. For the pics below, Andy literally stood in the corner of our room and turned in a circle to show the full view. It starts at the Statue of Liberty, passes Ground Zero, the Hudson River and Jersey across the shore, a grand view across Manhattan (look close to see the Empire State Building) and ends at the Brooklyn Bridge. It was phenominal.

The 3 Letter Word

2008-06-04T09:31:00.005-05:00

So lately Bella has started calling me something that truly bothers me. I think it is disrespectful, spiteful and over-all tacky. Ok...a little dramatic, however it does really bother me. So...what is it?

Mom

That's right. My tiny, sassy, un-tamed daughter with the largest vocabulary I know of any other 2 year old has decided that the term Mommy no longer suits me. I mean I would even take Momma rather than just...Mom.
A few days ago I noticed that every now and then she would refer to me as that 3-letter word that in my mind is what big kids say with a slight tone of embarrassment at the one who brought them into the world right? I mean sweet tiny babies like mine...they don't say Mom. I mean...come on she is too little still for that...right?
So in my quest to re-shape the term chosen by my sweet baby I began correcting her each and every time that she would refer to me as anything besides Mommy. This morning as her and I were laying side by side on my bed, her head propped up on the pillow next to mine and her arm resting on my chest I finally asked her a question that she answered in a way that only she and her Daddy can do which is uniquely satisfying and irritating at the same time...

Bella: I need somfin to eat Mom.
Me (Mommy): Bella, why do you keep calling me Mom? My name is Mommy and I want you to call me Mommy. Got it?
Bella: Nope. Got it...Mom?
Me (Mommy): No Bella, stop calling me that. I don't like it.
There was a change in my tone of voice that she obviously picked up on. I was cranky. She rose off her spot on the bed and propped herself up on one arm while with the other she placed her hand lightly on my forehead.
Bella: Shhhh, sweet boy (ok...we are still working on that part) I love Mom and a Mommy too. Jus welax.

From the mouths of babes folks...
Am I afraid of Bella growing up, sure. Granted Andy and I do treat Bella as if each day she should be headed out the door to go and conquer the world around her. But at the same time what mother doesn't want to keep their little ones in the precious "I need you Mommy" phase just a little bit longer than it actually lasts? But I guess if she never grows up then she would never get to see or become all of the amazing things that I know God has in store for her. So I will take this small step in stride, I mean at least she isn't calling me Emily yet...and if she did, I admit I would probably be begging to be Just Mom again.

Moments with Bella

2008-05-27T15:48:00.004-05:00

So as I was being so spiritual in posting the lyrics to the song below right? Well, just now I was sitting on the couch with Bella and started to sing to myself that very song...again feeling like I was being very spiritual. However Bella's response kind of ruined the moment for me...

Me...singing,or trying to. Bella...next to me on the couch.
Bella: Momma stop singing please.
Me: Why Bella? I like this song.
Bella: Your bweth is stinkin it up on da couch.
Me: Bella, don't say that to me. It's not nice to say that someone's breath is stinky.
Bella: You needa bwush you teef Momma.
...
...
...
Me: Well..you still pee in your pants Bella.

That's right folks, I am that mature.

Good Song...

2008-05-27T14:44:00.002-05:00

Thought I would share the lyrics to this one for those who haven't heard it...

Empty and Beautiful by Matt Maher
My past won't stop haunting me
In this prison there's a fight between who I am and who I used to be
But this thorn in my side is of grace
For because of it the flesh and blood of God was offered in my place

You fought the fight in me
You chased me down and finished the race
I was blind but now I see
Jesus you kept the faith in me

Where did my best friends go?
At my defense they disappeared just like your friends did to you oh Lord
But You were there, you gave me strength
So this little one might come to know the Glory of Your Name

You fought the fight in me
You chased me down and finished the race
I was blind but now I see
Jesus you kept the faith in me

Interpretations of Lyrics. Author: Bella Tilly

2008-05-27T12:47:00.004-05:00

Well, Andy came through with the most amazing gift to our home. Hours of Craig's list and a little but of a scary trip to meet a strange man at a storage unit on Garland Road later...Andy has brought music into our home! If you know me, then you know that this new addition has excited me more than just about anything in our new home so far. I Love Music.
I used to think that my mother was crazy for wanting to always have worship music playing throughout the house I grew up in. Yet as an adult living the call that Andy and I have chosen to live, now I can see what just that simple act can do in the environment of our home.
It so happens that Bella loves music does as well. However, due to her limited understanding of what the actual words that make up the lyrics of a song are, she has developed her own interpretation of a few of her favorites that she asks me to play throughout the day. As she hops, jumps, sways and twirls in circles until she inevitably runs into the fireplace or the TV, her tiny hands clapping or lifted high in the air, of course as her loving mother I am in awe of the innocence taking place in my living room in its purest form. However having the sense of humor that I do, I can't help but laugh at the words that come out of her mouth as she tries to mimic the words of the song. Here is just a few of her originals:

"Hosanna in da high-chair" (Hosanna in the Highest)
"Hoeding is da door" (Holy is the Lord)
"Is awe because a Jesus I'm a die" (It's all because of Jesus I'm alive)...umm we might need get this one straightened out soon.
"Jesus, u da my bess fwend, you da is a bee" (Jesus, you are my best friend, you will always be)
"Ebwy day is you I dig fo" (Everyday it's You I live for)
And for her favorite non-worship song by Paul Simon...
"You can be my potty barn, I can be da losta towel" (You can be my bodyguard, I can be your long lost pal)

Yes, that's our Bella.

My Favorite Afternoon

2008-05-21T08:47:00.003-05:00

So our trip to NYC last weekend, other than making idiots of ourselves as I mentioned in my last post, was nothing short of amazing. We have been so beyond busy the last few months that time having Andy all to myself was awesome. We flew first class, ate great food, had the greatest hotel room, saw Blue Man Group (sat second row), did some shopping and enjoyed the life of The City That Never Sleeps. It was fantastic. But overall, my most favorite part of the trip has now become my most favorite afternoon that I have ever spent with my husband.

If you know Andy and I then it's no secret that our lives are very, very full of many, many things. Andy decided a long time ago that he would maximize each and every opportunity thrown his way to make any impact he can on anyone that he can get his hands on. Marrying him, well this sort of became my lot in life as well but that was no surprise to me. If God has ever made anything crystal clear to me it was the day that He told me that my purpose in life was to bring Him glory and the way He was going to have me do that for the rest of my life was be sold out and dedicated to supporting and loving Andy Tilly and raising any crazy little ones that we may have to follow in their Daddy's foot steps...headed to change the world around them. Even though I had no idea what the future would hold for me, make no mistake about it...I knew that this would not be a normal life with it's challenges and sacrifices, nor would it be one that too many people get to have with it's blessings and experiences. All of this is to say, time...real time with my husband is priceless to me. In fact, I don't even know if priceless can even begin to describe how much I truly treasure any moments I can get where he is just all mine. No emails, no text messages, no talk about the latest book idea or project, no proof-reading our latest book to publish. Just me and Andy taking a walk.

It was after our incident in Central Park when we decided to head to Chelsea Market. I had been super excited to see this place being that above the market is the home of Food Network Studios. So the market was a bit of a disappointment and after I moped all the way through brunch Andy had the idea that we would see where we were on our $7.95 map of NYC (a whole different story) to see how far we would actually have to walk to get back to our hotel in lower Manhattan. It looked a good 3 miles away, but we decided to just walk until we got tired and then we would get a cab. Andy wanted to head to the harbor and then walk south from there. I agreed. As we walked through Greenwich Village it started to cloud up and get a little drizzly. Once we got to the harbor of the Hudson River we turned to the left and just started walking. We talked off and on about things not of any particular significance, which is quite rare for Andy to do. We laughed at some old stories that we hadn’t thought about in a long time. We enjoyed seeing this part of the city, out of the trendy tourist spots…this was just people living everyday life in Manhattan. The air was cool and full of a mix of smells from the stink of the city to the saltiness of the harbor. We came across the most interesting enclosed/outdoor sports complex full of little ones playing soccer at one end and stopped to watch a little league game at the other end. It was a truly amazing thing to stumble upon, you never would have even known it was there.

As we walked and laughed, I hung on Andy’s every word. It was just Em and Andy, in no hurry and with no point in what we were doing at all, and I was going to soak up every single second of it because this was the exact opposite of how our life together has played out so far. Lot’s of people get their time with my amazing husband, this was my turn. Next thing we knew, we had made it the entire way back to the hotel…it had to be at least 3 miles. But as we approached the entrance, even though it was starting to lightly rain again…we kept walking. We rounded the corner and headed to get a slice of authentic New York City pizza, one of my favorite things. Sitting in the drizzle on the steps of some corporate building we finished our pizza and I realized that our afternoon full of things of no particular importance was coming to an end. I looked to my husband, who bless his heart works harder than anyone that I know and thought to myself “Remember this day Emily, when you are frustrated that Andy walks around like a zombie after a 14 hour day. Remember the time he took just for you today when you want to get mad that he has to start a project in the middle of the night because he just can’t stop his wheels from spinning. Don’t forget about this afternoon when you have to go back home and share him with the world again.”

I know it may seem like nothing to most people, but this afternoon with Andy will be with me forever. It was just me and Andy, taking a walk. I had him all to myself and it was fantastic.

History Makers...or Not Really...

2008-05-20T10:21:00.005-05:00

Location: Manhattan, NY- Central Park South Entrance
Time: 8:30 AM EST
Goal: Take a relaxing and romantic Sunday morning stroll through Central Park.
What We Expected to See: Runners, Joggers, Kids with parents, Women with strollers and a few random New Yorkers who would also be out to take a relaxing and romantic Sunday morning stroll through Central Park.

The series of events:
8:30 AM EST: Entered the park and soon found ourselves surrounded by a sea of people rushing towards the top road of the park. Odd? No but not what we expected.
8:35 AM EST: Found the path less traveled and headed deeper into the park.
8:40-8:55 AM EST: Took a relaxing and romantic Sunday morning stroll in Central Park.
9:00 AM EST: Alerted by the booming sound of voices and cheering over a loud PA system a few minutes from us.
9:01 AM EST: Andy had to check it out...maybe it was a church service??
9:10 AM EST: The crowd around us began to change. Hundreds of people were now in view. Lots of guys holding hands with guys, girls doing the same as well. People in matching shirts. Signs every now and then.

Thoughts for the moment: "Hmmm, this is a little odd. I am pretty sure this isn't going to be a church service. But hey, it's Manhattan so it's not like this is too far out there for Manhattan right? I mean, none of this is too strange, like crazy strange. Let's keep going and see what's happening here."

9:25 AM EST: Bruce Villanche (from Hollywood Squares) and Hal Sparks (from various TV shows such as I Love the 80's) take the stage.

The Opening Line: "Let's just take a minute to celebrate what has gone on recently with the advancements in the rights of Gay Marriage people!!!! Let's also take a minute to be sad for those who settled for members of the opposite sex and hate it."

Thoughts for the moment: "Ok, well...this might get a little awkward...but ok that's a big issue throughout America for some people so I get it. I mean once again this is NYC right?"

9:35 AM EST: For the first time we actually begin to survey the area around us.
9:37 AM EST: A bright green sign reading "Condoms Save Lives." Not too strange for me, I get that.
9:38 AM EST: A tall man (or woman) dressed in an outfit that resembled a large banana suit, which I later realized was indeed not a banana suit at all. Ok, this is getting a little odd.
9:40 AM EST: A bald man, wearing the slip of a wedding gown, with nipples drawn on his sleeveless t-shirt, sporting a pink stick-on beard on his chin, pushing a gold spray painted grocery cart loaded with trash bags and a small chihuahua who was dressed in a dog-sized clown outfit, all while keeping a parakeet perfectly balanced on the man's head. Side Note: Andy seemed to think that the clown-suited dog was the only thing odd about this guy as he passed us...which I found kind of humorous and a little scary at the same time. Ok, this was getting weird.
9:45 AM EST: A glance past the same sex couples, the cross-dressing man with the bird on his head and the huge gospel choir (yep, they were there too) revealed literally thousands of people gathered in groups at the back of the clearing. When I say thousands, I mean thousands.
The realization of the morning begins to come from the stage:
"Welcome to all of you who have joined us today. (Crowd of thousands goes wild.) Thank you so much for being here to participate. This is one of the largest events in Manhattan and YOU are all a part of it."
Me: Ok, participate...Ummm Andy I think it's time to go.
Andy: Yes babe, let's get out of here before we get run over. I think we are standing on the starting line for whatever this is. Huh, isn't that odd?
9:50 AM EST: We head to exit the park. Happy for those who were walking for a good cause however I was feeling quite out of my element. That's just the truth of it folks.
10:00 AM EST: We find ourselves being cheered for and clapped at as we are mistaken for 2 dedicated Walkers being that we chose to take the path out out of the park that was the actual route for the Walk. (In retrospect I think we need to pay more attention...I get that now.)
10:10 AM EST: Cheers in our direction turn to scowls and "you know where you can go buddy" looks as we actually, it needs to be admitted, wiggle past the barricade set to keep the route in place for the Walk and truck it out of the park.
10:15 AM EST: We noticed, for the first time signs up and down the streets of the city,

Sunday, May 18th 2008
Central Park, Manhattan
New York City Aids Walk

In one light: Andy and I were a part of one of the largest events in Manhattan and did something to make a statement for a good cause. We were a part of history!
In another: We were 2 people from the Bible Belt who even though believed in the cause, were admittedly out of our element and I had never been so nervous of getting slapped in the face by a man dressed from head to toe in the latest styles from the Gap.

Bella's Boo-boo

2008-05-13T15:43:00.002-05:00

Ok, so if you read my Mother's Day post then you know that Bella suffered a slight chin scrape at my parent's house while she and Channing were playing. Alright, maybe this screams that I need to leave the house more based on the fact that this is Bella's first actual injury. As slight as it was, it has become the entire focus and reason for any conversation to take place between Bella and I since yesterday. Bella is obsessed. Case-in-point:

Me: Bella, What do you want for lunch?
Bella: Just don't touch-a my boo-boo.
Me: Ok Bella, I am not going to touch your boo-boo. What do you want to eat?
Bella: Momma, I gotta da boo-boo and I just need sumfin to eat.
Me: Yes Bella, I know you are hungry. What do you want to eat?
Bella: I jus need no more boo-boo's Mommy.
Me: Ok, you are getting Mac 'n Cheese.
Bella: An nooooo boo-boo's on da side.
Me: Ok, I will not put any boo-boo on the side.

or maybe this one

Bella: Mommay!! Mommay come here please!
Me: What is it Bella. Do you need something?
Bella: Don't toucha my boo-boo ok?
Me: Bella I am not going to touch your boo-boo. Can I go back to work now?
Bella: Jus no boo-boo's on da couch fo me ok?
Me: Ok Bella. I will be sure that I don't have any boo-boo's waiting on the couch for you.

So just now as I am trying to get her to nap and after 2 days of every other sentence consisting of some sort of plea to get me not to touch her boo-boo what happened? I go into her room and there is no longer a giant scab on Bella's chin but yet an exposed, slimey scratch.

Me: Baby, where did your boo-boo go?
Bella: I ate it Mommy.

Nice.

Food Blog Update

2008-05-13T14:35:00.001-05:00

If you read the food blog, I have added some new recipes as well as a new shopping tip for one of my new FAVORITE spots. Enjoy!

Simple Things

2008-05-12T10:38:00.007-05:00

Ok...I know Mom's across America are ALL writing blog posts about Mother's Day but oh well, this is my contribution.
Mother's Day for me this year was perfect. After about 2 weeks of house guests in and out we sent the last one off on yesterday morning. It had been a GREAT time getting to have friends in our home, old and new however we were just about worn out. Side Note: Can I just say how much I love our house?? Andy if you read this...Thank you once again for my beautiful home.
So we were exhausted, however the simplest events of the day made it the most perfect Mother's Day for me. Andy had already bought me some great kitchen stuff, including an awesome new knife...but not like a shank...it was for cooking. We sent Andy's dear friend David on his way back to Oklahoma and then loaded up to head to the Denton Campus. Great service. Ran a few errands...which Andy and I never do together...hit Best Buy for another step in Andy's quest for a cost-effective surround sound system for our home, had some Chipotle at my request where Bella infact sat quietly and ate her chips and guacamole and then headed home. The afternoon was spent with a new Elmo DVD about potty training mixed with intermitent dance breaks as Andy hooked up our new electronic addition to the living room. Bella took turns in and out of her bed refusing to nap but still being a little too sassy to be awake. Between her visits to bed she was successfull at doing her business in her potty which was a much needed victory for her and I both. Tried to put her down one last time before heading to my parents house for a quick dinner with the fam...discovered her totally naked in her bed an hour later...no nap. Headed to Mom and Dad's where we had a great time. Our visit there ended with a slight boo-boo to Bella's chin after having a meeting between her face and the brick floor, however it wasn't too bad since 3 minutes later a small special bowl Beba (my mom) had was placed in Bella's line of sight, full of ice cream the incident was long forgotten. Headed back home again.
Bella was in bed about an hour later sleeping soundly as Andy fed his latest fascination...Craig's List. I sat and watched Dateline compliments of our DVR about the Comic Book Murder of 1990. Didn't finish the show due to being "paged" from the front part of the house. Bella was covered in sweat, drenched and mumbling "no more night-night" but still not quite awake. I turned down the lights in the living room, just enough to keep her sleepy but still allow Andy to discover that he can indeed buy frequent flyer miles on Craig's List. Bella sank into our couch, tightly snuggled up to my side, but totally taking up my spot. We relaxed. Bella never falls asleep anywhere besides a bed, unless she is sick. But this time she slowly nodded off next to me. As I sat and soaked up the sweet precious touch of my tired, sweaty little girl I thought about the day. What made it so great? Nothing imparticular at all. Simply the little things.
Not sitting at church by myself.
Having lunch where I wanted to eat and not having my child embarrass me in the process.
Sat through a DVD where the words Pee and Poo-Poo were used at least once in every sentance, but paid off with an afternoon of potty success in the Tilly House.
Watched my darling husband pretend he did not enjoy the sillyness of Bella's random dance breaks as he toiled away to give me some music in my home once again. Somthing that I truly love.
Enjoyed a great meal and time with my amazing family.
Fixed a boo-boo.
Got some unexpected snuggle time with my precious little Bella.
Nodded off to sleep with my sweet Andy by my side after hanging on his every word while he ended our day together by thanking God for what a great wife I am...man I wish that were always true.
Not much to anyone else I am sure, but an unforgettable day to me.

Innocence...and a little more humiliation

2008-05-09T14:04:00.003-05:00

So even though I vowed never to return to the Albertson's on the loop in Denton after Bella's last stunt there...it's just so darn close that 2 days ago I ended up there once again. However I was holding my breath that Jeff from register 7 would not be there, of course he was indeed...he is always there. Why couldn't Bella have picked the flaky, dirty girl who never seems to show up for work to humiliate me in front of rather than the employee with the best attendance of all time???!!

Anyway, so Bella and I are rushing through picking up just a few things. I figured what could she possibly do in 20 minutes at 8:00 in the morning...I now know that I grossly underestimate my daughter's ability to make every situation the most time efficient as possible to accomplish her goals. (Sounds like her Daddy to me...)

Headed to the produce section to pick up a few bags of salad (horribly over priced by the way and if I ever get ecoli...I am gonna be ticked) Bella does a double take at a large man standing at the tomato and avocado section. Nothing abnormal right? Sure, if you are not a 2 year old with a big mouth. There was nothing strange about the man to me as I see people with dark skin, light skin, yellow skin all the time. However not only was this the darkest (I mean DARK) black man that I had ever seen, he also had a huge bushy black beard and a head of bushy black hair to match. All I thought as we passed him was "Man, I bet he gets pretty hot in the summer time with all of that hair and beard." Bella on the other hand had eyes about to pop out of her head in silent awe until she suddenly blurted out
"Mommy, DERE SA BEAR IN DA GWOSHWY STORE!!"
I don't think that I can accurately describe the level of humiliation that I felt at that very moment. Yet it was about to get worse...
I said in a hushed voice directly in her tiny little face "Bella, Look at me right now. Do NOT say that again. That is a not a bear".
Bless her heart, just like when she spots a bug on the back porch and I can't see it...she was ready to try her hardest to get Mommy to see that there was indeed a bear in the grocery store.
"No, right dere Mommy! I see it! It's a bear in da gwoshwy store!!"
Her eyes were huge with excitement and fear. I on the other hand felt such an intense shade of red all over my entire body that I feared I was going to ignite right there on the spot. This was worse than the tooting incident. Worse that the Dr's office asking everyone as they came out of the bathroom if they had pooped or not. Worse than her pulling 1/2 of my boob out of my shirt in front of about 20 people after Andy had just finished speaking. Even worse than the day I started my...girly monthly visitor and our school secretary who was a little hard of hearing marched from classroom to classroom, each one full of my peers, announcing that "Emily Kuykendall is out here in the hallway and she needs a Kotex."

This was worse than all of that. I was so nervous that she had offended this guy and here I was with the racist 2 year old! However, the truth of the matter was that this was nothing but innocence at its finest. Bella sees people with different skin than hers all of time and it has never even crossed her mind to think of that as strange. But this guy...not to be rude, really did resemble slightly to me and for sure to the 2 year old mind a bushy, hairy, dark bear ready to make some guacamole.

To end the story, this guy (thank the Lord!!) actually got quite a kick out of Bella's analyzing him and in fact turned to her with a huge grin and gave her a little growl. All I can figure is this was not the first time that this had ever happened to him. Nonetheless I was still so embarrassed and high-tailed it to the check out for fear of what she might say next. I was just waiting for someone in a wheel chair to come around the corner and have Bella need to give her 2 cents about them as well...again in innocence, but geez kid!

As we get in the car, I am still reeling from the entire incident what does Bella have to say about the recent turn of events?

"Does bears eat tomatoes Mommy?"

"I don't know Bella...I bet they probably do."

"I tink dey do Mommy. I tink dey do."

Something New in the Kitchen

2008-05-05T11:09:00.001-05:00

My food blog is up and running for anyone who is interested. I am trying to post at least one recipe a day. www.newmealideas.blogspot.com

The Joys of Parenting Part 1

2008-05-04T14:21:00.006-05:00

So many things happen as parents that I think are probably hilarious to others. In fact, I think that it is quite humorous when I see some kid in the grocery store pull down his Mom's skirt with his feet as he is riding in the grocery cart. However to the parents of the misbehaving child...it can be difficult to find the humor. So here is my first entry about the many joys of parenting...when your kids just don't so what they should in the most inopportune times.

So if you have read my other stories about Bella then you know by now that she happens to have picked up the English language in a way that has honestly amazed me. My sweet little girl, so an assuming with those big brown eyes and her wispy hair (which yes, I am aware is slightly beginning to resemble a tiny mullet). I know that I am not just saying this as her mom, Bella can seriously put together complete thoughts and sentences better than any other kid her age I have ever met. My Mom (awesome woman by the way and if you don't know her, you are missing out) any way my Mom brought it to my attention the other day that when I was a kid my teachers would always comment on my use of big words. So I guess it's kind of similar to Bella's knack for speech. She also seems to have inherited her Momma's creative childhood imagination when it comes to thinking quick on her feet. When I was in pre-school I sat at the lunch table with a single chip in my lunchbox. To avoid getting in trouble for the fact that I had already snuck off and ate my lunch, when the teacher asked me where my lunch was I told her that my parents lock me up under the stairs and that they do not let me eat. We didn't even have any stairs. According to my Aunt I also felt the need to add that this abuse was the reason that I was such a small child. So I can see where she gets it.

There is a certain delicate beauty to the combination of these 2 things. Having a child who can speak extremely well who also has a pretty good imagination can be entertaining and humiliating at the same time. Case-in-point: We are in Albertson's picking up the stuff to cook lunch for Andy's youth and kids teams. As it becomes our turn the young man, Jeff, at the register smiles and gives Bella a little wave. She pretends to be shy of course (the act begins). Once he stopped paying attention to her she decided that she needed just a little more from him.

"Mommy tooted in the car" she spouts out.

I tried hard to pretend as if I did not know what she had just said hoping that he was not skilled at translating 2-year old. However the kid talks so freakin good...who was I kidding. The guy couldn't have been any older that 19 so of course this was funny to him. His reply "Oh yeah?" followed by stifled laughter by not only him but the 15 year old packing up my groceries.

Bella, to increase my humiliation just a little more "Uh, huh. We wowed the windows down." Are you kidding me child! What are you trying to do to me??!!

However it was too late at that point. The awkwardness of the situation was quickly over-ridden when my sense of humor kicked back in. It was funny and if it wasn't me it would have been hilarious. The best part folks: I never tooted in the car. The event that she so matter-of-factly told Jeff at Alberston's on loop 288 never even happened. I don't know who tooted in the car with Bella and rolled the windows down to alleviate the stink however it was not me. But will I pay the price every time that Jeff is the only register open. Thanks Bella.

My Little Watcher

2008-05-04T13:26:00.009-05:00

Bella is a watcher. She can get pretty shy and has a habit of being quite cautious of who she chooses to interact with. She has absolutely no problem letting you know if you are a little too close to her boundary line. Ever since she was a baby, she has had a very specific process of selection when it comes to new people. She studies situations rather than rushing into any decisions. But once you are in with Bella, good luck getting rid of her.

She has started to pick up on things much quicker than I am probably prepared for. I had her with me last Wednesday when we went to the United Baptism Bash. Bella thinks its just about the coolest thing ever to see her Daddy up on the huge screens. She loves the lights and definitely the music. We were standing in the back to avoid her from trying to rush the stage to get to Andy. One of my favorite worship songs started to play and I was so thrilled to hear it. In the moment I had my eyes closed and one hand in the air. I figured she wouldn't wander too far from me while my eyes were closed being that she is a pretty cautious kid. Next thing I know I felt the gentle touch of a tiny hand wisp across my knee. I looked down and there was Bella, one hand in the air and the other covering her eyes...kind of. Once she saw me looking down to her, it was time for her to show me how good she was at singing just like Mommy was. She started to sway side to side, waiving her little hand in the air and for the final touch she began to move her mouth as if she knew the words to the song. It was such a classic moment. She was so serious.

There are so many things I am sure throughout her life that she will see me do wrong. There are so many things that I can't even fathom being able to teach her. I fear for the day when Bella wants help with her homework...I hardly even showed up for high school!! (Proud times for my parents I am sure...) I am the first to admit that I have absolutely no clue how to raise a child, especially such a strong-willed, little too smart for her own good, sassy child. But watching her mimic me with such intensity and hope that I would be proud of her made me realize that even if I don't know how to teach her all of the big things that life will being her way, maybe the small, simple things that I can show her are just as important. Maybe I can do this afterall...

Food Blog

2008-05-01T14:26:00.001-05:00

Real quick, I have started up a recipe and meal idea blog for anyone who is interested. I haven't posted any recipes yet, but I will be soon. It's www.newmealideas.blogspot.com if anyone wants to check it out in a few days.

Kid's Television

2008-04-30T12:52:00.003-05:00

If your young one watches the Noggin network then you will get a kick out of this. Kids television...ridiculous at best however for us honest moms it is also quite essential to the everyday flow of things day in and day out. If you are like me, not only does one of the TV's in your house always have some sort of kids show on, you also have put your DVR to good use by recording episodes of Doodlebops, Johnny and the Sprites, The Wiggles, Charlie and Lola etc. to have on demand at any given time. We were a strictly Disney family until the last few weeks Bella has become interested in the Noggin Channel. A few funny things have recently happened in our house regarding this new found jewel of children's entertainment:

1. Dora and Boots are now a staple on the DVR. Swiper is now someone that Bella has started to blame when she makes a mess.
2. Yo Gabba Gabba...geez. If you have seen this one you understand when I say DJ Lance...I shutter to think about what you do on the weekends.
3. Oswald (the big blue octopus) and his hot-dog shaped pet dog. You know her name is Weenie right? After stumbling into this treasure Bella now about 5 times a day calls out "I want Weenie" or Andy's favorite "Mommy, do you like Weenie?" (If you think thats funny, then you think like my husband does...ok I think it's funny too.)
4. Little Bill. Ok, I need to rant a but on this one. Cute show, I get that it is supposed to "Enhance preschoolers' social and interpersonal skills, help build ethical values and encourage an appreciation and understanding of community" however the first episode Bella ever saw taught her something much more. This show can be a little slow at times, but being that it is the animation brain child of Bill Cosby, I will allow it. Anyway there is an episode called "The Meanest Thing" or something like that. Basically it is supposed to teach not to say mean things. Good lesson. However Bella only watched the first 3 minutes of the show before she became uninterested. So what right? Well it just so happens that the first 3 minutes of this episode is not a whole lot more than a kid at Bill's school calling Bill names. So did Bella walk away with stronger ethical values or an encouraged appreciation of community, no she did not. What did she learn? That Mommy is a "Stinky baby poo-poo diaper head" or as Bella says a "sinky baby poo-poo dipah hayed".

Thanks Noggin, you are indeed a two-edged sword.

Moments with Bella...

2008-04-28T23:56:00.003-05:00

Andy and I have a habit of talking to Bella as if she is a 20 year old person. Since we are..let's say less than savvy at the whole raising small beings into becoming people thing, I guess it would make since that we aren't the typical parents. Thus brings us to tonight's quick moment with Bella.

Me: Boo, I sure do love you.
Bella: I love you too Momma last night. (Again, the whole adding last night to random phrases still exists.)
Me: You know you are going to be a world changer Bella?
Bella: Uh-huh.
Me: Bella, do you know that you will be a world changer because Jesus loves you very much?
Bella: Uh-huh Mommy, and I want some chee-sus too on a turkey sanwich wit some bread.
Me: Bella, I said Jesus, not chee-sus.
Bella: Uh-huh Mommy, and I want some chee-sus on some bread wit some turkey in it.
As I stare at my daughter holding a very serious look on her face (and she does not joke when it comes to food) I decide to go get her left-over turkey and cheese sandwich from Subway out of the fridge and see what she comes up with.
As she takes her first bite and realizes that I gave her just what she asked for...
Bella: Oh Momma, I just lova me some Chee-sus...
She pauses trying hard to make me proud of her picking up at least part of what I was trying to teach her.
Bella: J...J... Jesus (another bite)...wit some turkey and bread.
Me: You are welcome baby.
Bella: Tank-you Mommy for my...Jesus...and I need some chips too.

I loved it. That's my girl.

Little Girls and Their Daddies

2008-04-26T12:47:00.003-05:00

I have the most amazing Dad on the earth. Andy grew up the youngest of 3 boys so he really didn't understand when I have mentioned things about the special bond between Daddies and Daughters. I guess it's fair to say that the bond is only special if it is done right, so maybe special isn't the right word. Maybe influential to life is a better term. Think about it, done wrong (or not done at all) it can create a gaping whole in the middle of who we are but done well it can be the best foundation for who we are going to be in life.

I happen to be someone who was raised with the most amazing, strong and tender father in the world. In my common sense I know that he's not perfect since the fact remains that he is indeed human, but in my heart he absolutely is. As a little girl my Dad was gone a ton. When he would come back into town sometimes he would take me on a date. I can still remember getting dressed up in the fanciest Easter dress that I owned complete with pink pearls ready for a night out at Steak and Ale with my Daddy. I felt pretty...but looking back now I think the reason that memory has stuck with me for so long right next to the times that he would take me to the nicest restaurants in Manhattan and let me order whatever I wanted was not about feeling pretty but about feeling special. I saw my Dad as the single-most powerful person on the planet and for those moments he was interested in me and only me. He was interested in my stories (or at least pretended to be), he laughed at my jokes. He would beam with pride when some waiter would make a comment about how beautiful my big brown eyes were or how shocked they were that I could eat more than a grown man. I used to love it (and still do) when people would tell me that I looked just like him. It was just one more sign that he was my Daddy. In fact as silly as it sounds, I could not be more thrilled that Bella looks just like him too. Goes to show you that things girls feel when they are little don't always get erased with logic and responsibility. I think its safe to say that some of the saddest moments in my life have been when I knew that I let him down or hurt him. I feel the same way when I know that I have done or said something rotten to Andy.

I have begun to get so excited about the bond that Andy and Bella will have. Granted he does send her screaming and running out of the room when he walks in the door half of the time. But I think he is learning that it's not because she wants to get away from him but only to give her some attention. It's like her funny little way of saying come chase me, pick me up and launch me onto the bed way too hard, then tickle and kiss me under my chin until I am about to throw up from laughing too hard. When I watch the 2 of them sometimes my mind goes to the days when Bella will be backstage watching her Daddy speak to thousands of people, seeing God use him to change lives. I can't wait to see her learn to admire, respect, fear and adore her Daddy the way that I do mine. How awesome will it be to see her huge brown eyes beam with pride when she can say "That's my Daddy" just like I do. Geez how blessed am I to have that in a Father and a husband...pretty amazing.

Kids Food Tip

2008-04-24T12:25:00.002-05:00

Note: If you aren't a mom who is always thinking about how to keep your kids diet in shape, then skip over this one today.

Since I seem to always have food/cooking/cooking food on my brain, I thought that I would pass on a new product that I have found for Bella that I think is a great one. Last week I was in the pasta aisle looking for some healthy pasta for...I would like to say Bella. However truth be known I am what some might call, a pasta slut being that I would pass up any kind of dessert on the face of the planet for a huge bowl of pasta. Anyway, I was looking for something that I could eat and not feel so gluttonous for doing so. No luck but I did come across a new pasta that is Bella's new favorite and great for her. (I still have to steer clear being that I do have the before mentioned pasta issue.) Back to the point, Heartland has a Disney themed pasta out called Tigger Tails. They are an excellent source of Whole Grain and Fiber, 2 things that I know a lot of kids lack.

Anyway, for what it's worth I thought it might be worth a try for any of you Mommas who like to find new and healthy options for your kids.

And by the way, I do officially feel like a washed out house mom being that I just wrote a blog post about pasta.

Moments with Bella

2008-04-23T17:06:00.005-05:00

A few hours ago I was putting Bella down for a nap. Sleep time with Bella is about 50/50. Sometimes she gets pissed about the situation and others she goes down without a peep. As her vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds the times that she is angry about having to go to bed have become filled with very interesting phrases as she attempts to plead her way out of bed. (Speaking of her extensive vocabulary, we got several compliments on her speech at the Dr's office today, that of which I took total credit for).

Today's naptime was worth writing down. Screaming at the top of her lungs I went into try and calm her down and let her know that everything was going to be alright.
Me: "Sweet baby, calm down and stop screaming. Just take one quick night-night so you can stay up late to see Daddy later."
Her reply was tear filled and absolutely precious: "Momma, I justs lovin Daddy and he needs to spanka my booty. I justs needin my Daddy."
I gently said to her, trying not to snicker at her innocence: "Baby, you need Daddy spank your booty?"
Bella: "Uh, huh he callded me on da phone."
Me: "He called you on the phone? What did he say?"
Bella: "He says to get me some ice-squeem."
Me: "Ice cream? What else did Daddy say?"
Bella's final thought: "Daddy lovin me and my silly booty. Is a-little."
Me, in total love with my daughter: "Yes baby, Daddy loves you and your silly little booty."

Get it Right

2008-04-22T09:48:00.004-05:00

I still have a lot of learning to do.
Probably need to do some growing up as well.
Need to do some talking to God.

Loving in Life

2008-04-20T10:06:00.008-05:00

Life has been a roller coaster since I met Andy. I have never met someone before who intrigued me like he did. I didn't start out as his biggest fan, but my spirit was in love with him from the first time I ever saw him speaking from the stage. It was an event that no one showed up for...it was a total flop. My dad and I were 2 of 8 in the audience. Andy had worked so hard and the night was a disaster. But I walked away from that night knowing for some reason knowing that he needed me. I just had no idea what that was going to look like down the road.

We never actually dated, just knew we were a fit for what God had for both of us. Honestly as of lately I think we have both started to learn that the reasons we thought God put us together are not set in stone. They seem to be changing just as we do. The more we learn about each other it seems the more that our roles to each other have needed to adapt. Not gonna lie, it can be really challenging. But I guess I have decided that this is what marriage is all about. I don't think that one day you look up at each other when you are in your 80's and you decide that you have finally figured the other one out. Maybe its that way for some, but that's not what I want. There are so many sides of life that I want to see. I want a life full of experiences. And at the end of the day, if the goal is to keep striving to be more like Christ anyway then shouldn't I always be changing, growing and learning? I guess where I am going with this is that I don't think its such a bad thing to realize that there is still so much to learn about someone who you are supposed to know inside and out. To me, I think love should always keep growing. I never want to say that I finally know how to love my husband in the perfect way since I hope it always gets bigger and more definite to who we are at whatever point in life we find ourselves in.

In closing I will say this at the risk of him getting made fun of for it. No matter what may come our way, at the end of the day God giving Andy to me as my leader and my husband is the absolute greatest honor I know that I will ever have in life.

Potty Brain

2008-04-18T13:59:00.007-05:00

Well, the time has come for the Tilly Family to enter into the new season of Personal Toilet Useage with an Emphasis on Bowel Control also known as Potty Training. Last weekend Bella and I together picked out her very first potty. I say that we both decided which purchase to make, however I did veto her vote for the $45 Tigger and Pooh Training Stool as I do not think it is necessary to have Tigger laugh and giggle randomly as Bella is perched on the pot. It would seem to me that the idea of this would only prolong the process since my child being the dreamer she is would be convinced that Tigger and Pooh do live in a plastic toilet in our guest bathroom and need constant attention and possily even snacks (she has the gift of hospitality).

So "together" we decided on the Comfort Seat Training Potty (in Pretty Pink). We get it home and of course within the first 2 minutes of sitting on her comfy removable potty seat, she had officialy christened the new purchase. I was so proud! We are working at it slowly but surely now. I am not into the pee-pee nazi stage yet. I am just letting her figure it out for now.

It has been so funny watching Andy find his way through this. If you know him, you know that Andy is not a big bodily functions guy. Infact, I can tell you that to this day, unless one of us was sleeping there has never been a passing of gas situation. I think that we both feel that it doesn't matter if you are married or not, certain things just never become ok. Farting for amusement falls into that category. We always get a kick out of our close friend Evan and how unashamedly he can burp as if there is a volcano erupting in his gut. Whats even better is when he keeps his mouth shut during the process and Bella thinks that Evan is growling like a bear. (Love you Evan you silly burping fool!)

Anyway, Andy and I are not big into the sharing of functions between the 2 of us. So all of this poo-poo and pee-pee talk has really been an new experience for my darling husband. I love watching him try to act so excited for Bella when she annouces that she needs to relieve herself or cheer her on when she has been successful. It is way out of his comfort zone but he is doing a fantastic job.

In closing I will add a funny story. I realized yesterday that there is no possible way that Potty and everything that goes along with it cannot be a huge deal at home and not have that follow us into public. Bella and I were sitting the waiting room at my Dr's office around 1 o'clock yesterday afternoon. It seemed that no matter where we sat, Bella had a perfect view of the bathrooms as well as everyone coming in and out of them. As the sound of a toilet flush echoed through the waiting area, I saw Bella's eyes get about as wide as I had ever seen them. She had made the connection that there was a potty in close proximity to us and that the people coming from behind the door in the corner were indeed using it. Soon, as I feared, Bella began to give the play by play as each person entered the bathroom, closed the door behind them, had a slight pause of time (Musta be poo-pooin she called it), flushed the toilet, washed their hands and exited the "potty room" as Bella named it. I tried to get her to whisper her comments as I was getting slightly embarrased. That would work for about 2 minutes until her excitement would take over and she would blurt out something like "Did dey poop Momma?" or "You hearin da pee-pee Mommy?" I heard the people around us slowly start to snicker and giggle. Eventually Bella had almot the entire room waiting to hear what she had to say next. It became humerous after I got over the initial humilaiton of having to look someone in the eye who had just been on the toilet for 15 minutes only to be greeted upon exiting the bathroom by my daughter who had quite correctly identified the fact poo-poo had indeed taken place and had maybe "just gotta stuck".

1 1/2 hrs. of this only to end up in the exam room, waiting to get blood taken when Bella then decides not to use the skill we have just obsessed over for the last 90 minutes but to fill her diaper leaving me to sit in the stink in a 6x9 room for another hour. Geez...

Oh be Careful...

2008-04-18T12:30:00.006-05:00

So I was getting Bella ready to put her in the shower this morning and I got a small glimpse of how aware I need to become of what I say in front of my Mockingbird of a Child. (Who by the way right now is sitting in her high-chair liking the last bits of nacho cheese off of the lid to her Mexi-Dips and Chips that I just got her from Bueno. She knows that Bueno is indeed Bueno.) Anyway, I am teaching her the concept of dressing herself. Being that she prefers the "natural" side of things, she is of course much better at the undressing rather than the actual dressing. Either way, we were in our master bathroom (or bafwoom) when I told Bella it was time to take her pants off. Sure enough, down they came. However being that they were slightly tighter at the bottom since they were her jammie pants, her feet were still stuck inside. The tile was a bit cold so of course she refused to sit down and try to get her feet out. As she grew more and more frustrated at the situation, being the awesome mother I am, I chose to be amused by all of this as her little attitude built to the point where she was about to explode. It was quite comical watching her frantic little march as her tiny legs attemped with each jerk up of the knee to break free from the grasp of the Baby Gap jammies. Finally I asked "Boo boo, do you want some help?" The reply "No mama, I can do it last night."
Side Note: Bella has started rsndomly adding the phrase "last night" to her sentances. Not sure why.
Anyway, about 30 seconds later I took another approach trying to help her to still maintain some independence in the situation. "Boo, what are you doing baby?" Her reply this time "I jus can't gettin da fweekin pants off."

Lesson Learned: If "Fweekin" were the worst thing she has ever heard me say I would not feel bad at all. However I think anyone who knows me can guess that not to be the case. Time to watch it.

Freakin Ants

2008-04-16T09:53:00.002-05:00

One quick note, what is the deal with the stupid ants in Texas! I have spent almost half of my morning sharing the focus with Bella on her poor little foot that is covered with itchy, red, bumpy blisters! Two days ago, despite the fact that I repeatedly told Bella (and Andy) No Dirt!! not shockingly she ended up squatting with a stick in her tiny hand firmly shoved smack-dab in the middle of an ant pile. By the look of her foot, the ants did not enjoy her visit. But Bella however had the time of her life! If it weren't for the foot covered in blisters you would have no idea that they absolutely bit the crap out of her. The kid didn't even make a peep. Now in my opinion my child happens to have an extremely high pain tolerance. In fact, there was a point when she was a baby (and I had spent entirely too much time alone with a baby, no car and way too much Oprah) that I almost convinced myself that Bella had that rare disease where you never feel any pain.

Side Note to Elaborate: Did anyone else see that Oprah with the kid in the goggles and helmet who had to have her teeth pulled out to keep her from chewing her own tongue off?? I am not making fun, but geez how much would that suck...I mean really.

So anyway, for some reason I started to think that maybe Bella had some sort of neurological disorder that kept her from feeling any pain because even though she was dramatic, stuff didn't seem to hurt like it should. I knew that this was leaning towards the "lady who keeps bags of her kids hair under the bed" life style, so soon after I decided that I needed to limit my Oprah intake. However then I moved onto Little People Big World and what followed was a slight season when I thought that Bella might be an LP. But Andy totally played into that one too so it wasn't just me!

Anyway, all of this is to say that I am counting the minutes until Trey from Adam's Pest Control knocks on my door with his jug of bug killer and eliminates the Tilly Ant Sanctuary in our backyard. And as for the LP thing, everyone assures me that Bella is not a dwarf, just petite.

The Tree

2008-04-15T16:07:00.001-05:00

Some of you I am sure heard about the tree incident that happened during the storm last week. I think Andy referred to it as "The gates of Hell opened in our back yard". We didn't get any pictures with the camera before Andy hacked our once gorgeous Bradford Pear Tree up with a chainsaw (which as I now know are strangely enough well known for being easily uprooted in hell-like storms). Here is the aftermath...

Elmo, Animal Movie, Daddy's Suitcase and Boobies

2008-04-15T15:45:00.001-05:00

Being that Bella and I are a little under the weather today with what I like to call The Devil Cough, our sweet little girl has been a bit loopy seemingly due to all the Tylenol/Motrin doses from the last 2 days. However, I just discovered that she has kept her wits about her quite well being that she just gave me a very accurate description of what she was doing when I yelled to her from the living room after she had been quiet for a little too long in our bedroom.

Me: Bella, what are you doing baby?

Bella: I-sa just in daddy's suitcase wit Elmo watchin Animal Movie in my boobies.

Isn't it great when you ask your kid a question and the day arrives when you actually get an accurate answer? Next time I won't bother getting up to make sure she is telling the truth I guess. But she does come by the "tell it like it is" mentality from her Daddy too. And she covered every last detail...just like her Daddy.

Bella Moments (Inspired by Cindy Beall's Conversations with Seth)

2008-04-13T15:26:00.001-05:00

Me as I am standing at the sink: $*%# Bella Tilly did you just bite me?!?! Did you just bite Momma?!?!

Bella: No, my just my teeth did righta on-da booty.

Bay-Cay-Shun

2008-04-13T13:44:00.001-05:00

I have fallen so far behind...but I am back in the game! Had a few funny things happen over the last 10 days. We just returned from our first official Tilly/Kuykendall family vacation! Or as Bella calls it...hence the name of the post...Bay-Cay-Shun. First off, let me begin by saying that I happen to have 2 of the most amazing parents ever who gave our family as well as my brother, his wife and 2 kids an awesome trip. But I must say that after all is said and done, I have decided that "vacation" with kids is an experience unlike anything that resembles the original term. So I will now be calling any trip involving my child by a different name. Bella's name was perfect...so this is a quick run-down of our Bay-Cay-Shun to Big Cedar Lodge in Branson Missourri, 2008.

Since the car ride is an exhausting 8 hrs. (9 with all the kid stops) we decided to break up the trek by staying a few nights in OKC. I like to call this part of the trip, The Hell Ride of Andy and Bella. She did fine the first hour of the 2 1/2 hr. trip. However, it was around Ardmore when Bella decided that she was just about done looking for the occasional choo-choo train or spotting any Braum's billboards only to beg for "ice squeem" for the next 10 minutes. Of course being the Momma I was doing my best to keep her entertained. Yet Andy was quickly reaching his limit. Since he slightly tends to expect Bella to hold the same understanding of life as he himself does, the 2 of them can definitely go a few rounds with each other. After Andy had finally had enough of Bella shouting from the back seat "Stop talking Daddy!" or "Hang up da phone Daddy!!" or "No more mookiss (music)Daddy!!". They had both reached their limits. In our vast knowledge of child rearing, the decision Andy made was to turn up the stereo in my new cute little car as loud as possible and let her have it out with herself in the back seat. About the last 10 minutes of the trip, 1 1/2 hours later, she finally gave up after nearly vomiting on herself from screaming so hard. What a crappy beginning to our trip.

But even though it started rough, she ended on a good note a few days later hardly making a peep for the rest of the 5 hr. journey. However, Andy was not present for her good behavior as he had opted to ride with my Dad in another car. Easy way out...easy way out.

Big Cedar was gorgeous. My brother Caleb and his wife Robbie showed up a few days later with Channing (3) and Asher (5 months). I will say that they are much braver than I am. A week away from home with 2 kids...8-9 hours in the car at a time. I am the first to say that they are better parents and probably just better people overall than I am. Of course Bella and Channing were 2 peas in a pod. We had the occasional argument between them. My favorite was the 2 of them yelling at each other about "who's bossy it was" after I had finished telling them both to quit being so bossy. But overall they did great. The 2 of them are so different. Not to mention the fact that they look absolutely nothing alike. You would never know that the Einstein looking blonde haired, bright blue eyed Channing is related at all to my black eyed little crazy woman who still at age 2 1/2 shows no signs of ever being in need of a hair cut of any sort.

I will end with my favorite part of the whole trip. It was the afternoon on the boat. We have not really been big Pontoon people, in fact Andy in the past has found it necessary to label some of the people who rent them as the "doosh bags of the lake world". But my Dad knew better this trip and Andy had absolutely no complaints about the one we got this time around. It was honestly one of the nicest Pontoon boats I have ever been on. I am so glad we decided to do it because it gave me one of my best memories of Bella to date.

With Papa (my dad) behind the wheel we set out to try to find a few fishing spots. The lake was up 15 feet so we could actually get the huge freakin boat in some pretty good spots. But the best part was watching my absolutely fearless little girl enjoy the exhilaration of her very first boat ride. She had on a life jacket that made it nearly impossible for her to sit down since she is not really a "child of size". After running from one end of the boat to the other countless times I finally told Andy to get a hold of her as the images of her shooting off the front straight into the water as we continued traveling 45 miles an hour kept flodding into my mind. Being that I am not the most cautious of parents (I have more than enough "Crap, I am so glad no one was here to see that or CPS would be at my door" moments), I didn't want to see her quit having fun either. So of course the normal way of holding into her was not going to happen. In the end, Bella spent the majority of the boat ride suspended in mid-air, hanging by only the loop on the back of her life jacket wrapped tightly around her Daddy's hand while also cutting off the circulation to his fingers. Arms straight out in front of her, hair (or lack thereof) attempting to blow in the wind, pointed off the front of the boat, mouth wide open, drool running across her cheek and all the while screaming at the top of her lungs "I lova da boat! I lova da little ocean! I lova da flyin!!" It was a great memory. I have got to get some pictures up of it soon. It was priceless.

Dogs and 2 Year Olds

2008-03-27T11:18:00.001-05:00

Phoebe...she belongs to my parents and is in my opinion just a great freakin' dog. She is with Bella and I today and it has been quite an interesting morning watching the interaction between the 2 of them. They are actually alike in more ways than one, which feels odd saying about my daughter and a dog, but again I am a big Phoebe fan. They both have great big brown eyes, they both are very runt-like and they are both quite sneaky little creatures.

As I opened Bella's door this morning (after she had slept in until 9:45...what a great kid!!) the squeal that was let out of my tiny little woman was unreal when she saw Phoebe dart across her floor. Bella was obviously under the impression that Phoebe had come over for a play date. Today I have learned that as smart as I think my daughter is, she however has no idea that Phoebe is indeed a dog.

After many attempts to get Phoebe to stack blocks, have a tea party, put on a diaper (and then straight onto putting on panties) Bella had a decision on her hands. Phoebe was not cooperating. Bella, being the problem solver that she is, decided that Phoebe's way of doing things was perfectly acceptable. The activity in the Tilly house since that decision has consisted of the following: Bella is refusing to walk...crawling like Phoebe is the transportation of choice. I am not entirely sure if I should be concerned or not being as I am not positive of the actual amount of dog food that Bella ate before I caught her on her hands and knees eating out of Phoebe's bowl. And the last 2 times that the sensation to pee-pee has come around, Bella has begged to go take care of it out in the yard and get a treat for it just like the dog does. After both of them barking, both of them sniffing me over and over again and both of them eating some unknown amount of dog food, things are calm. But it seems now that Phoebe has decided to do a few things Bella's way. Monster's Inc. is now on the big screen TV, Cheerios (not Purina) are being eaten and "the girls" are snuggled together watching Sully and Mike chase boo around the factory. One thing has remained on Phoebe's terms however. They are both tightly cuddled up in Phoebe's dog bed that Bella has named "Phoebe's Potty" as it slightly resembles a tiny toilet.

Unexpected Surprises

2008-03-26T09:51:00.001-05:00

Right now I am watching my little crazy daughter dance around to music on the Disney Channel in only a diaper, with a paintbrush in her hand, pausing from time to time only to attempt to learn the motor skill of actually jumping. She is really getting frustrated that she can't get her feet off the ground. She has actually stopped a few times to sit down and inspect the bottom of her long little toes to be sure that there is nothing holding them down. Her little hands are freezing and I am sure her feet are too. The windows are open. That's right, I am that Mom. I never got her dressed after she climbed into bed with me (via Andy who had not held her since he was sweaty from the gym) and sat right on my head just in time for me to discover that she was soaked in pee.

People told me many things about motherhood. The crying, the time-outs, the learning, the eating...I got all that. However, no one ever made it clear to me actually how often bodily functions are a part of the picture. I understood that diapers and potty training were going to be part of my new life but that was just the beginning. I have decided that along with the rule of "You never sleep the same way again after you have kids" also should come the rule of "You can never assume that feces (as Andy calls it), pee-pee, vomit, snot, eye goop or sometimes even all of the above at one time will not be a nice little addition to your day ever again." Don't get me wrong, I take the good and the bad with Bella. However, sometimes I like to remember the days when my adult conversations never contained the word "poopie" or had to ever discuss the actual consistency of the "poopie". I think back to the days when I had never experienced being awakened by screams only to enter a room with my poor kid covered (along with her entire bed) in vomit. My new favorite as of lately are to remember the times when not only could I go to the bathroom alone, but when I didn't have someone tying to peek into the toilet as I am actually sitting on it.

In closing to that thought as I sit here and gripe in my own little way I will say this- the truth of it is that as Andy looks at me about to vomit himself as our poor little Bella was ridding herself of a stomach bug in our living room floor at 5 in the morning and he asks me later "How do you do that and not loose it?" my answer is simple "It's just what Mommas do." However this blog is about honesty, so I will not lead you to think that I don't closely follow that sweet statement with "But that was pretty freakin nasty. Almost fantastic but in a really, really bad way."

Potty Training...a great result but I have to think the process probably is far worse than changing diapers, but we shall see soon. And then when all is said and done, we will have conquered another step in Bella becoming self-sufficient, moving onto the next one which will be one more area in which she will no longer need my help. And I bet I will be a little sad.

ADDED LATER: I need to add that just as I finished the entry above, Bella was dancing on our ottoman to The Doodlebops. She suddenly stopped, opened her eyes as wide as they could get and yelled at the top of her lungs as I was on the phone "Mommy I tootin' and dancin!!" As the toots kept coming she got so excited. "I TOOTIN' AND DANCIN' TOO MOMMY!!!" She was so proud of doing both at the same time, that the fact she can't quite jump yet faded away because she had a new skill. My response is that of any loving mother "Great job baby! Great job!"

Worth Writing About

2008-03-25T16:38:00.001-05:00

So it only took until today, March 25th, 2008 at age 26 to finally start my own blog. Let's just say I have been a little behind the times. Either way, this is my first step into the "blog revolution". I dont' know what took me so long. Probably a fear of maybe saying too much or being too personal for who knows who to read. But at the end of the day, here it goes.

I guess I decided a long time ago that life needed to be written down. Too many things happen each and every day that I never want to forget. I just happen to have the world's absolute crappiest hand-writing and it seems like everytime that I tried to journal with some junky word-doc I ended up going back and editing anything that I had written a few days before (kind of defeats the purpose of writing for the moment right?). So what's worth writing to me? I happen to be one of those people who have plenty of the "What the heck just happened", "Life is amazing", and the ever popular (and my personal favorite) "Are you freakin' kidding me" moments. To me, those are worth writing. I don't know if they are "write worthy" to me because I think someone else would like to know the story, or I would like to read the story later, or possbily (based on past experiences) I need to document exactly what happened so that my wonderful husband Andy won't...we will say "embellish" the story in the future. (There was an incident at an airport in Thailand involving me and a member of Thai Airways personnel...but that is all that needs to be said.)

So in closing, for my very first blog entry I end with this. There are too many things to share, too many tiny treasures to remember and too many twists and turns of life to hope that we will always be able to recall as they were inthe moment they were lived. So I am writing ours, our little family of Andy, Bella and I. And as long as the internet never crashes (which according to Andy would destroy the entire world anyway) we will always have our little moments, just as they happened, free of any "additions" by Andy to make them sound more ridiculous and free of any edits by me to make them sound any less ridiculous. This will be fun.